night falls

"

On Mother’s Day, no one is going to send me flowers or a card. I will not be awakened by sweet, giggling toddlers bearing a tray of breakfast in their chubby hands or receive an awkward but heartfelt hug from a gangly teenage son or end a phone call with a teary, dorm-bound daughter saying, “I love you, Mom.” I am no one’s mother, and I never will be.

This is not by accident, a case of insurmountable physical challenges, an unwilling partner or prioritizing career over children. At age 39, the window of my fertility is sliding shut, but I feel no sense of dread, panic or regret. I have known since I was a child myself that I didn’t want to have any of my own. It’s simply astonishing to me how frequently people — strangers, especially — have felt that I should answer to them for that.

"

-

—I am nobody’s mother and I never will be, by Kat Kinsman

I’m really happy that this was published. As Mother’s Day approaches, I am certainly grateful to my mother, and equally certain that I would not make the same choices that she did. I will never have children - I have no desire to have them and never have. And that’s okay! We all choose our own paths in life, it’s time to stop judging the choices that other women make about the reproductive aspect of their lives.

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